I expect you, like me, are inundated with emails and notifications about all the things you 'should' could be doing to improve your life. From addressing stress/adrenal burnout and overwhelm, to progressing your career in a new direction. Some of them seem really appealing and may indeed by very helpful. But what if the problem is not in your life NOW but in your experience IN THE PAST? This is what I call Hidden Stress and it is very significant.
This is something that few people (I'm an exception!) address. But it didn't occur to me that this was something I had a problem with til I got depression and anxiety in my early 30's. That set in motion a complete seismic shift in me that got me to where I am now. What I learned got
me well again and is informing what I do now to help others.
Emotional responses are programmed from early experience with care givers - it's called 'attachment' and it becomes your default behaviour which is completely unconscious. Whether it's flying off the handle for no reason when criticised (rage - who hasn't done that one?!), or being overwhelmed with demands that you don't feel you can meet (feelings of inadequacy) but still pushing yourself relentlessly. It usually leads to suffering in one way or another.
So why should something that happened so long ago still affect us? Well the answer is surprising - the part of the brain that stores emotionally overwhelming memories has no sense of time! So what happened then (maybe we were not understood by our parents, your mother had depression, or was overwhelmed or traumatised for some reason) is present in our mind and body as a feeling that we can't shake and we react as a result to stressful situation in the current life with the weight of the past behind us. So we can respond in ways that bewilder us and our loved ones...
So, even if you do all the right things in life now (diet, exercise, meditation, etc) you can still experience difficulties that you struggle to resolve. Luckily a 'stiff upper lip' approach is not longer the only option!
Thanks to modern neuroscience and psychology, we have an understanding of what happens in the brains of people when they experience overwhelm in early life that doesn't resolve - the brain gets changed. luckily too we now have the TOOLS to resolve these changes. And they are making HUGE differences in the lives of people that I work with 121.
If you are interested in finding out more I am launching a new online course called Thrive! which I am starting March 31st at 4pm. consisting of 3 Modules once a week for 3 weeks, it's an interactive course that allows you to learn and ask questions to embed your understanding with the QnA Session. To learn more watch my introductory video here and you will find a special offer code that will give you £30 off.
Don't settle for the life you learned to survive in, learn to truly thrive instead. Join me on Facebook live tomorrow (Monday 28th March 2022) at 10am where I will discuss the course or check out this recorded video below.
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